My Dearest Neely:
Words seem so paltry and useless at this moment. I can’t believe you are gone and that I will never again hear your sweet voice, your soft southern twang and your bemused laughter that always sounds like you are hiding a secret. I remember like it was yesterday when we first met, but it was over 20 years ago! We were so young and life was so full of possibilities, so unlived. We looked at each other and just knew we had to be friends, we were at the Radio Bar with Ricardo and Eric and we were both the whitest, palest people ever. I remember when you starred in my film and how your skin radiated a glow so we almost didn’t need a light at all. We called you Neely because you were so intense and small just like Neely in Valley of the Dolls sans the madness of course… I remember you cooking for me (shrimp) at your apartment in Stuyvesant town, us barhopping while hiding from Ricardo and the boys after they decided to have a night out without us, and then got all jealous when they found out we also planned a night out and spent the entire night trying to track us down. I remember all the late night phone conversations after you moved to LA and how glad I was that you made so many friends through Andy and the Wolf company. I remember when I came to visit and your little studio in Hollywood and your VW beetle that you had since you were a little girl. I remember all the happy times and all the heartbreaks and despair, and how your boundless love and generosity that always seemed to triumph over adversity. I admire your pluck and willingness to move on, not just move on but move across country (cats and all), to Virginia and then finally to your beloved New Orleans and your beloved sister who is not just your sister but also your best friend, how I envied your relationship and wished I too had a sister. I was so happy for you last year when you called from New Orleans and described your new digs, your joy and happiness to be settled in your favorite city. How sad that your stay proved to be so short but it is fitting that nothing short of a natural disaster would drive you away. I have worried so much about you since the hurricane, this was the first time in 20 years I couldn’t find you to wish you a happy birthday, and the first time I had nowhere to send you a Christmas card. Finally, finally you called me for my birthday and I was so happy to hear your voice again that I cried, but then I cried because your voice was so tired and little because you were so ill.
I remember the last time I saw you 2 years ago when you finally came to New York, and there was a terrible snow storm, which in no way deterred you from spending over 2 hours to get downtown to Rocky’s opening and it was well worth the trek, to see your hauntingly beautiful picture on the wall. I was so grateful to have you for a few days and so surprised when a couple of weeks later you sent me a picture of my cats that you had snapped of them looking at their first snow, I was astonished that your love of cat creatures was expanded to include mine. Oh Noodles, how was I to know that was the last time, how can you possibly be gone? I know if there is a heaven then you are there and that you are the toast of the town surrounded by the love you so richly deserve. I miss you and will keep you in my heart always.
Thank you for being my friend.
Sola
